T9 Is Not Your Friend*

I am still toiling away under the incredible burden of a cell phone without a full keyboard and make full use of the T9 feature when texting. This feature displays the most commonly used word from a given sequence of keys and allows you to scroll through other options spelled with those keys and pick the one you want. It's much quicker than the tedious and carpal-tunnel-syndrome-inducing multi-tap method, though when you're distracted or in too big a hurry to hit send, your text can take on an entirely different meaning than you intended.

So, generally it helps me text a little faster, but sometimes it helps me look like a complete idiot--which is something I usually do quite well without assistance.

Last night, Daughter-Only texted me about staying over at a friend's house. I texted back, intending to tell her to be home early and ready to do her main chore around the house, which is cleaning the ferret cage.

The text she received--and read aloud to an assemblage of her friends--said, "Be home at a decent time and ready to do acid."

To this, one of her oh-so-helpful friends commented, "I always knew your mom was cool, but wow, this is a whole new level."

*Irrelevant aside (quick question: does an irrelevant aside to an essentially irrelevant post work like a double negative and somehow make either the post or the aside relevant?): The T9 in my current phone is also judgmental and a little prudish. I have repeatedly added my favorite four-letter words--some of which you may know as the F-word, the B-word and the S-word--only to have to add them again the next time I am in a ranting mood. For crap's sake, my T9 is so proper it won't even add "crap."