The following recording, obtained by Masked Mom through a secret informant close to the source, is actual dialogue between the Drama Princess and her Beleagured Mother. Recorded on the Eve of Daughter-Only/Drama Princess's Eleventh Birthday.
BM [any similarity between the initials of this poor mother and the shorthand for poop is entirely coincidental, but we would nonetheless like to point out that after the week she's had, Mom does kind of feel like crap]: YES?
[Both players are speaking at full volume since DO/DP is wandering aimlessly through the house and BM is in the bathtub]
DO/DP: What's for dinner and how much do you love me?
BM: [Stunned into silence. I mean, what units are we measuring this in? Is this one of those trick questions where I pick a number and whatever it is it's wrong? Or she uses whatever answer I give her as a bargaining chip in every negotiation between now and whenever she enters therapy?] Uhhhh...What kind of question is that?
DO/DP: I was just wondering. I'm going to T's. See ya' later!
Maybe Mom will be in therapy way before Daughter-Only ever gets there.
If You Only Listen
1 day ago