You Can't Get Entertainment Like That Just Anywhere

I have mentioned before that I spent a whole lot of time during and shortly after high school, toiling away at Burger King. There was certainly real toil involved in that job, but there were also hilarious moments that have stuck with me ever since.

For instance, I was once working the front counter and yelled back to the kid on what we called the "specialty board" (where non-burger sandwiches were made), "Hey! Can you make me a Whaler*?" 

Without missing a beat, the kid flicked his spatula at me and said, "Poof! You're a Whaler!" 

Maybe you had to be there--be there and be sleep-deprived and be running almost entirely on hormones, Cherry Coke, adrenaline and Milky Ways. 

Anyway, another time, I was at Burger King, not working, but waiting for my friends to finish closing up for the night. I was sitting on the counter between the drink dispensers as my friend J twisted off the red plastic nozzles and dropped them into a bowl of cleaning solution. Then she presented the bowl to me on the tips of her fingers, the way a caterer would hold a platter of bacon-wrapped shrimp, and said, "Little round plastic thing?" 

I laughed so hard I fell off the counter.



H is for Hors d'oeuvres 

*Burger King used to call their fish filet sandwich a Whaler. The ways in which this was wrong are too numerous to name. Fortunately, they recognized the error of their ways sometime in the late '80s or early '90s.