It's been said that nobody likes a smartass. To this I say: "It's way better than being a dumb ass." But, even more importantly, I think the proliferation of shoot-stuff-out-your-nose-hysterically funny blogs has disproven that old wives tale. Clearly, there are people out there (myself very much included) who not only like smartasses, but love them.
As someone who has cultivated my smartassitude for more than three decades, this is great news. That cultivation has led me to moments like the following, which I share with you now trusting that you are all of the likes a smartass persuasion:
The Scene: The shop the other morning. One of the shop groupies, a wannabe lecherous older guy who's been loyally and happily married for a bazillion years but nonetheless likes making dirty jokes and randy comments, many of which are hysterically funny, was talking about a conversation between him and an equally unlecherous lecher friend of his.
Wannabe Lecher: R and I were talking about what heaven was going to be like and we decided it would just be acres and acres of boobs.
Me: Yeah, and then when you and R get there, there will be two more!
What's not to love, right?
Wrong, Wrong, Wrong
9 hours ago