Friday, September 14, 2012

Ways I Am Not A Grown-Up, The Eleventh In A Potentially Infinite Series--UPDATED

I have a spectacularly dysfunctional relationship with food.

No lie.

It is 8:56 p.m. and so far today, I have eaten a handful of mini twist pretzels, a ham sandwich on wheat, and frosting. A whole lot of frosting.

Ugh.

 
 
You understand, of course, that every color must be taste-tested ad nauseum. Literally.


 
UPDATE: Lest you doubt that any of the frosting made it on to the cake, here is a partial shot of the finished product.

17 comments:

  1. Youngest Sister9/14/12, 9:17 PM

    Me too. Every year I swear I will not eat so many pieces of candy corn in one sitting that I feel like throwing up. Every year I am wrong.

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    1. "Every year I swear I will not eat so many pieces of candy corn in one sitting that I will feel like throwing up. Every year I am wrong." In my never-ending search for hilarious T-shirt slogans, this is a definite winner. Can't ya picture it? In candy corn colors? Heh. I haven't given in and bought my first bag yet this year, but it's comin' soon. I can feel it. I may have to wait for the frosting to settle a bit though.

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  2. One time when I was nine, I put 272 candy corns in my mouth at once. I have never eaten them since.
    Frosting, though.
    Your diet sounds like mine. It's embarrassing sometimes, but delicious.

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    Replies
    1. Also, whatcha decorating?

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    2. Other Kid (he of Poop Report fame) turns 11 tomorrow. I do his cake every year. This year, he requested a deer head on a blue background. It's still in the preparation stages (taste testing, you know), but I will post a picture of the finished product if it does not turn out too hideously.

      As for 272 candy corns, I cannot top that. I did however, fit 74 full-sized (domestic not wild) blueberries in my mouth at my aunt's house when I was 11. It was done on a dare. I got my mouth that full and started coughing and eventually a few blueberries shot out my nose. CLASSIC! :)

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    3. CLASSIC! Love the image of the 11 year old with blueberries spewing forth!

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    4. Seriously! It's on my childhood highlight reel! I'm not sure what-all that says about me. :)

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  3. Did someone say candy corns?
    Frosting? Can I has frosting? Please? A spoonful of each flavor because of course every flavor must be tested!

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    Replies
    1. Oh, Larissa, if I could figure out a way to get some to you in remotely palatable condition, I surely would. Would you settle for the recipe? ;)

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    2. Hahaha! Oh MM a girl will take why she can get! Truth is I've never been successful at making frosting ... (I forget to buy confectioners sugar and end up using regular... No don't imagine the mess that creates. So so dumb.) so I'd love to try out a new recipe.. And I'll remember to buy the proper sugar. Or at least stick the normal one in the blender!

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    3. P.S. the cake looks great. Wish I could draw that well anywhere... Much more on a cake!!

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  4. Too funny! I don't have much of a relationship with food but , trust me, my dysfunctional relationships are many and varied. Have you ever met my pal Pinot? Pinot Noir?

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    Replies
    1. Not yet, but I've heard a lot about him (her?) and he (she) sounds swell! Here's to dysfunctional relationships--they have their upsides for sure!

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  5. I thought frosting was part of the basic food groups....at least, that's how I roll!

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    Replies
    1. If we are what we eat, then all the sweetest people, must be frosting-eaters, right?

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  6. oooo and licking the bowl too. Love it!

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  7. Mm. Frosting. I remember a day where I had a jar of marshmallow fluff and a jar of refrigerated frosting on the table in front of me. And a spoon.

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