Some time after the Great Sock-Context Debate of 2007, I made the life-altering decision to start wearing men's white crew socks just like Hubby wears and I've been buying them in bulk for both of us ever since.
Now all the white crew socks in the house* belong to both of us, so I can no longer fairly be accused of sock thievery or using one of his socks "out of context."
Hubby has had some trouble adjusting to the concept of "our" socks, though and will still occasionally say, "Someone is stealing my socks again." And I will take great delight in saying, "I can't steal them because they're my socks, too!"
Today, there was a random (dirty) sock in the middle of the entryway floor and Daughter-Only said to her father, "Well, it's yours or Mom's because no one else in the house wears that kind."
Hubby said, "I know it's my sock because it doesn't have any holes it. I also know I didn't leave it there."
At this point, I peeked over the stair railing. "I've got news for you--I've been buying big bags of white crew socks for both of us for a couple of years now so you can stop trying to claim all the socks without holes as your own."
Smirking, Hubby said, "No, all the ones with holes are definitely yours."
"Honey, they all have holes--otherwise, you couldn't get your foot in them. So, they're all mine and I win!"
With that, I triumphantly swooped down, snatched up my dirty sock and flounced off to add it to the pile of my dirty socks.
*Except the six Nike pairs he saves for tennis, which I swear to Federer and Agassi I've never befouled with my foreign feet.
The Skin of Our Teeth
1 day ago